Bruntwood: Monologue

The lovely Sarah Logan and I went to the Bruntwood Prize Roadshow workshop today. That was a long description.

We looked at a monologue by Sarah Kane, from her script Crave. Craving consists of a long string of images that fly from place to body to contradiction to confirmation. My notes of our discussion of it:

Full of visual images, full of telling, the world is on view.

Its vulnerable and makes you feel sick with vulnerability

No punctuation drives it forward

Cause and effect structures the stream of consciousness

We choose a character from a series of photographs and created their back story, then we used the starting phrase, ‘I want’ to begin our character’s monologue. And the monologue I wrote harks back to a wednesday write in piece from time ago.

I want to turn back the ticking clock and take myself by the hand, there I am, small and unformed backed up against a tree trunk and they are hurtling past me many trees away. I do not remember if my fingers were on my lips or stuffed in my mouth to stop myself making a sound. I want to go back and check whether or not I am, and lean over and in my own ear whisper breath. I want to see my breath dissolve and evaporate into the shell of my ear, and the panic start to drip out of my eyes in the forgiveness of tears, the tears I never cried because fear had me by the throat. I want to place my hands, my older, more lined, my practised hands. I want to place them over my ears and block at the whoops and cheers of those children, running through the forest at full tilt of their engines. The clockwork inside them moves them forward. I want to move from that tree before they find me, before I am the next play thing and my hair is stuffed with feathers. I want to soothe the child inside me who bends from the waist and throws up their anxiety and watches a feather dangle by their nose, breeze lifting it by the tip. I will place a pigeon in my hands and restore flight.

It was an inspiring workshop, so that I am now actually thinking about working on a script again. 50 pages of dialogue…project for December.

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